Making Mum Friends: The Awkward Truth About Finding Your Tribe
A few years ago, I went to the dentist. After the receptionist checked me in, she said, go and take a seat in the waiting room, to which I replied, yeah, you too.
I wish that were the most awkward social encounter of my life, but unfortunately my daily life is somewhat of a slapstick routine.
Why Motherhood Feels Like High School Again
In my opinion, antenatal classes should spend less time on partners practising with forceps, and more time preparing you for the fact that becoming a mum throws you straight back into a high school style social minefield.
That is fine if you are someone who can keep a straight face when you hear that little Maximilian's name is spelt with a silent P, or that Isla was not allowed to attend Stephanie's birthday party because Steph's mum does not buy organic.
But what if you cannot keep the poker face, and have absolutely no idea how to make these things called mum friends?
The Play Group Minefield
You force yourself to go to play groups and wonder if parents are even allowed to touch the orange slices. Keyston and Talulah are not going near them because there are too many GMOs, but you do not want to straight out ask.
What is a girl supposed to do in that situation?
The Birthday Party for a Kid You Barely Know
Then there are the birthday parties. You do not really know this child, your daughter barely knows them either, but they happen to be in the same class. Congratulations, you now have to buy a present for a total stranger, while your husband insists that piccolo wine bottles do not count as dollhouse furniture.
Worse still, you now have to go and buy pants without an elastic waist, otherwise people keep asking when your non existent baby is due. Again.
Sometimes it feels like an awful lot of effort. Painting on a smile at school pick up when all you actually want is to get back to the car, undo your pants, and realise you forgot your shoes again.
Then, Something Amazing Happens
You find your tribe.
You find crumbs in your bra at the end of the day, and so do they. Your child loudly asks why that lady has a moustache, and you both burst out laughing. You message them at the end of a truly awful week, hands shaking and eyes wet, and know they are right there with you.
So go on, ask about the orange slices. It could be vitamin C for your soul.
Gifts Worth Bringing to the Next Birthday Party
When it is time to buy a present for a classmate you barely know, skip the plastic junk that ends up in landfill within a week. No Nasties Kids has a range of safe, non toxic gifts that both the birthday kid and their mum will actually appreciate.
